Not Worthy

On more than one occasion, I have been completely blown away by what God has done through one of His children. God used someone to bless me. In those moments, I just drop my head. The tidal wave of all the wrongs I’ve done and all the sins I committed come flooding back. I begin to question why God would choose to do this for me; a dirty, old sinner who doesn’t seem to learn his lesson easily. I feel so humble and completely unworthy of the kind of gifts God has given me. In my mind, someone else surely deserves this more than me. It is in times like this that I remind myself of the nature of God and it helps me understand why He does what He does.

First off, my sins have already been dealt with when Jesus Christ died on the cross and was resurrected. I have been saved by grace through faith (Ephesians 2:8) and my sins have been forgiven. I am no longer a dead man walking, but raised to new life in Him. I am His child. I am no longer condemned. (Romans 8:1) He loves me even when I did not love Him. I don’t have to feel guilty for the sins that He has already paid for and forgiven. I wish I would never mess up again, but He knows I will and loves me despite that fact.

Second, He knows how to give good gifts because He knows me. He created me. So He knows what I like, what I need, and what I want. “If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give what is good to those who ask Him! Matthew 7:11 (NASB) We know how to give good gifts to our kids because we love them, know them, and want them feel like they mean the world to us. God is perfect and knows us intimately. He knows how to give good gifts to us, even when we feel like we don’t deserve it.

I guess the part that really makes me question why God would choose to do it to me is the fact that I feel like I don’t deserve His extravagant favor in my life. He has done so much for me throughout all my life. He gave me life.  I was fortunate enough to be born into a Christian family that loves me very much. He gave some brains (depends on who you talk to anyway), strength (Morans are notoriously stout and stocky), and a drive that would rival just about anyone. He gave me a mostly perfect wife, a handsome son who might be my clone, and a precious little one coming in May. He has protected me through all my reckless and wild living. He has given me a nice home, a good job, and few toys to play with too! God has been so good to me that if He chooses to stop right there; it would be good enough. Shoot, let’s be honest; it would be more than enough. Yet, He doesn’t stop there. He steps in and goes above and beyond what I could even imagine.

Is this because I have some magical relationship with God? No! Does He love me more than you? No! So why does He do it? I don’t know. But I think the passage in Matthew 6:33 gives a hint to what God wants from us. “But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. I am not bragging; I am usually the first to point out my shortcomings. But this is my honest daily pursuit. All I have has been loaned to me by God and I want it all to be used to build His Kingdom, not mine. My desire is for more people to hear about Jesus and decide to follow Him. That is why I write, preach, teach, attempt to be a good husband and father as well as live differently than the way the world says is popular.

I hope as you read this that you do not begin thinking that this is the secret to God’s favor. I do not proclaim a prosperity gospel. He will not all of the sudden give you a big bank account or a nicer home because you read a verse or two. The point is that God wants you to be a part of His family and a part of His kingdom that will never fade away. God wants you! He Loves You! And how He chooses to bless you or show His favor is His business, but He is more likely to do so if you are His and you are truly devoted to His cause.There are so many ways throughout Scripture in which God promises blessings. But it usually means you going to where God is showering the blessings, not God sending the blessings to your plans.

How has God shown His great love to you? Have you ever felt that God outdid Himself? I would love to hear about it. Maybe you know that you do not have a relationship with Jesus and would like to know more. I would love to have a conversation with you about following Jesus.

Grace and Peace to you as begin to recognize all the big and small ways God shows His love to you.

 

 

 

 

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